Decoding the myth word mother-in-law!
Well, what pops up in your head, when hear the word, mother-in-law?
The inherent Indian will opt to those never ending Sass-Bahu soaps in Televisions. The word unquestionably runs a shiver through the spine of both men and women. Men, because, they don’t understand how the hell something goes wrong between his wife and Maa, when everything is going fine in the entire house. And women because, they are “well educated” (That’s sarcasm, for your information) with these soaps in all the languages.
When there is a relationship, there are going to be problems, no matter what! Don’t we see our Mom and Dad fight like India and Pakistan and then find them the next day, praising each other like nothing has ever happened in their life. The issue goes viral, when it is between a Daughter-in-Law and a Mother-in-Law.
When mom and dad fight, it’s their children, who are going to be the Panchayat presidents, and obviously, no power is given to them. They just stand supporting one group and the next day, they are handled like fools. But, when there is a mismatch in frequency between the In-laws, it’s going to be two different families. The Saas and the Bahu family! Which is kinda dangerous! The mother-in-law position is the most delicate position in this entire universe. They want their son to be happy and they cannot accept that there is someone other than them, who is going to give that to their son. Possessiveness and obsession are common in love! Especially in too much love!
When there is going to be a power struggle in the house, the best way to deal with it is staying calm, for both the parties. If it’s going to go beyond the walls of the house, it would be difficult to settle the issue as someone would remember something else that happened in the past and it would become “I-Don’t-Know-What-I-Am-Fighting-For” problem. A reasonable talk after few hours or a few days of the misunderstanding will do. So, if you ask me where to vent out all the resentment till that time, don’t act like a child. You are married (Or you will be). You have a partner to torture! :-p
This would reduce the friction and if you really love your partner, you are not going to make him feel bad for what their mom did and waste time over that. If the mistake is on your side, taking time will help in accepting that. Acting mature is equally frustrating as giving a speech to the “I-Don’t-care-What-You-Are-Talking” crowd. But, don’t think of escaping it. If you are the bad one, accept and don’t do it again.
Most Mothers-in-law, these days, are well educated and office going or well informed of the job difficulties that every woman undergoes. Because, you know what? All people work late night and some just at night which includes her son and daughter and in some good cases, themselves. This has made them soften their move towards the office going Bahu! And sometimes, the most suffered in-laws, never disturb you with obsession or other silly problems, because they know how childish it is to think of grabbing a place that would never be caught, no matter how hard she fights. Yes, being a wife is a promise you give to some one saying “I will endure you until death do that part for me” and that is the greatest promise you can give someone. And these days, In-laws too understand that! Good sign!
How do you feel when your sister/friend takes your “forever-favorite” dress and at the end of the day you find that she has poured the “Never-will-go-sauce” in it? Horrible, right? If you could develop this much attachment to a dress, how could you expect you mother-in-law, not to get agitated at your silly mistakes you do to your husband? She would think that you are ruining the most beautiful thing she has ever brought to this world with your cooking and every stuff you do to him. If you see it this way, it would be so funny. Isn’t it? As long as your husband can endure your everything, you are good to go. It is not that difficult.
As long as you are good, nothing bad can happen to you! One day, you will find out, you are not loving your husband enough. That day, you will remember your mother-in-law. That day will be the day, when you get your baby in your hand.
Take a deep breath! You are not alone in this big world! Be happy! That there is someone to compensate the love you are not going to give your husband! The man who would be your forever person, created by a woman’s love. And you know what? Thank your mother-in-law for creating the man of your dreams. If not her, your dream man would have been in your dream alone.