In Hinduism, let me not be so vague, in Iyer marriages, there is one function called nalangu. This one happens in the evening of the marriage. All the old ladies of the bride and the groom side would be present for conducting this "kind of" game thing. Though this boring ritual(like all the others) happens the same way in every marriage, this one's the critical game of all in marriage. The ladies of both the house would decide whether the bride or the groom is going to adjust throughout their life.
Appalam udaithal:
The bride and the groom will be given appalam (a falt round edible material made of dal or rice and usually ate after frying in oil). They would be asked to break it over each other. Where they break it decide how they would treat their partner during fights. An appalam is as feeble as problems in a relationship. When the bride/ groom breaks it in the head of the other, it means they are going to deal every problem right away. On the face. No compromises. When they break it in the back of the other, it means they would be okay with problems coming and will deal it more deliberately.
Mugam parthal:
This is pretty interesting one. The bride and the groom will comb the hair of the other. The twist in the tale is they would be combing with the wrong side. And each other would show the mirror to the other asking if they look good. Again, someone, usually the mischievous among the two, would show the wrong side of the mirror. The reaction of the other during the game would decide how they would deal with the decisions of the other. If the partner says that they indeed look good after that bad combing session, they are the understanding ones among the two. If they ask for another session where they stress the other to comb properly, they are going to be tough and for them truth is truth. No matter how much they love the other, they will place their self respect over the relationship and would expect the other to be the same.
Arisi taren parupu ta:
This one tests if both can live with what they earn. One of them will be given rice on their hand and the other will be given dal. They will be exchanging the goods with each other. In-between one of them would stop giving and the other has to give what they have to fill others hand. This shows that, in a family both might be earning or only one would be earning. Whatever be the scenario, they have to lead their life with what they earn and do not complain the other for not doing so.
There are other games too. But, these three gives the real picture of how life would be after marriage. Just thought I would share the traditional things like this for some time.
Appalam udaithal:
The bride and the groom will be given appalam (a falt round edible material made of dal or rice and usually ate after frying in oil). They would be asked to break it over each other. Where they break it decide how they would treat their partner during fights. An appalam is as feeble as problems in a relationship. When the bride/ groom breaks it in the head of the other, it means they are going to deal every problem right away. On the face. No compromises. When they break it in the back of the other, it means they would be okay with problems coming and will deal it more deliberately.
Mugam parthal:
This is pretty interesting one. The bride and the groom will comb the hair of the other. The twist in the tale is they would be combing with the wrong side. And each other would show the mirror to the other asking if they look good. Again, someone, usually the mischievous among the two, would show the wrong side of the mirror. The reaction of the other during the game would decide how they would deal with the decisions of the other. If the partner says that they indeed look good after that bad combing session, they are the understanding ones among the two. If they ask for another session where they stress the other to comb properly, they are going to be tough and for them truth is truth. No matter how much they love the other, they will place their self respect over the relationship and would expect the other to be the same.
Arisi taren parupu ta:
This one tests if both can live with what they earn. One of them will be given rice on their hand and the other will be given dal. They will be exchanging the goods with each other. In-between one of them would stop giving and the other has to give what they have to fill others hand. This shows that, in a family both might be earning or only one would be earning. Whatever be the scenario, they have to lead their life with what they earn and do not complain the other for not doing so.
There are other games too. But, these three gives the real picture of how life would be after marriage. Just thought I would share the traditional things like this for some time.
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