The trend of scrolling over nothing

When we see people these days, you can see them scrolling and scrolling and again scrolling after seeing your lifeless face. Facebook, Instagram and YouTube has become the priority now. Its like everything that happens in there, the way the celebrities dress, the family gatherings, the office milestones, anything you mention, its there and that has become more important than anything else. Its always there. Everybody sees the viral video, making it viral. They forever forget that, its them watching that video, is the one who is making it viral.

A phone, a smart phone, has become an undenied necessity of everyone's everyday life. And also a shield during awkward conversations. Just look at the phone screen when you are talking and it's a clue the opposite person has to catch from the other that, they are not interested in the conversation or they can stop it right there and start their own scrolling bussiness. And surprisingly or unsurprisingly, this body language has invaded relationships too. For centuries, women, who talk to their husbands tend to be said unheard. Cellphone has just made it easier.

Children tend to neglect their parents, which they always do. But, the intensity with which they do it, have increased. And with everything from bad to worse to worst available in that little piece of electronic marvel, the anxiety of parents have rose to the peak. Child rearing is not going to be easy with the phones clinging around everybody's thumb. And the life of those kids are no easier either. The unattainable or over expectations, that will be placed on them, by their millennial parents and by themselves on them, like a perfect body shape, stupid online challenges and the fear of missing out, if they switch off their phone, is going to make them more clinging to their phones, than to their beloved parents.

Conversations have become awkward. And the scrolling thing, a new normal. Posting statuses and stories have become another new normal. And online bullying and poking and stalking are ruining lives, every minute.

While, the millennial era has brought everything in our fingertip, the fear and the truth of running your entire life also remains to be in a fingertip. Not just yours, but the entire human kind can ditch you in a fingertip. Just pray to be lucky enough, not to let you emotions, react on the Social media platforms. Pray for a normal life. Pray for a normal day, in the era of electronic viral videos. Pray that you shouldn't be a part of it, for your own good. Well, if it's a good one, then you are already lucky.

The resistance - crossing the threshold for success!

When there is a problem, there ought to be a solution! When there is a current, there ought to be a resistance! Am I right?
I have read one famous quote from an athlete. I do not remember the name. The meaning of it goes just like this, "When there is a pain in your muscle, that is when the real training starts. I start counting my rounds in the ground only then."
So, everyone would have come across this point. The successful ones and the failed ones. And the courage to cross this point makes them the former or the latter, respectively. This is called a threshold point.

Take one example:
There is this fitness program. It involves you both mentally and physically. At physical level, when you want to reduce your ever dangling belly, you have to go through tough abdominal exercises and also forgetting your bad diet of pizzas and Puris.

Seeing your crush and the resolve to make them see you back, at school or college or office would definitely force you to stick on to those exercise regimes and diet plans for say only two days or a week. What really can make you an healthy individual is, your mental strength.

There would be a point where there would be so much pain in your legs, hands and andomen after all those circuits. You would think, is this really needed? What is this pain worth? Should I change myself for someone else? Why not stay obese? Everyone, who loves me, never care about me being fat and big! After all many people eat more than me and still stay thin. That's so irrational. I will stay like this. It's fine. This is the resistance. This is the threshold. It is there in your mind and not in anyone's head. It's you who can control that and no one else. When you cross that point, that is when the real change in your life happens. When you do it for yourself, when you accept that pain and say to yourself, "The beautiful body I want is not that easy but achievable. The healthy life I want is on the other side of this swirling river. The journey would be difficult but enjoyable."

When you complain and stop going any further, you are fearing the threshold point. When you try to bear the pain at that point, you are having half of your success in your hand.

Every situation in life will have a threshold point. Every ambitious person would face that point in their life. The person who cross it with all their mental strength is the winner. No doubt you might lose a few times after crossing that point. But, those are obstacles right. A person who want to taste the fruit of success, will never deny to take the bitter medicine called failure or set of obstacles in their life.

That is the resistance I was trying to talk about when the current of success is trying to flow in a conductor called life. That point where you choose to go further or stay where you are.

The Facebook page #Ayearofrunning is the best example for this. Those people out there chose to change them for their own good. And now many have won marathons and have become fitness gurus.

You might also face the same kind of resistance in your life when you try to achieve what you want in life. You might also come across that point called threshold, which might give you 1000 reasons to drop your plan. But, it's all in you head to decide what you want to do with that resistance and whether to cross that threshold.

#Muchlove
#Muchwriting
#Muchlife
An inspiring Ted talk on the above topic, which inspired me to write this article

Nalangu - a good trailer of how life would be, after marriage!

In Hinduism, let me not be so vague, in Iyer marriages, there is one function called nalangu. This one happens in the evening of the marriage. All the old ladies of the bride and the groom side would be present for conducting this "kind of" game thing. Though this boring ritual(like all the others) happens the same way in every marriage, this one's the critical game of all in marriage. The ladies of both the house would decide whether the bride or the groom is going to adjust throughout their life.

Appalam udaithal:
The bride and the groom will be given appalam (a falt round edible material made of dal or rice and usually ate after frying in oil). They would be asked to break it over each other. Where they break it decide how they would treat their partner during fights. An appalam is as feeble as problems in a relationship. When the bride/ groom breaks it in the head of the other, it means they are going to deal every problem right away. On the face. No compromises. When they break it in the back of the other, it means they would be okay with problems coming and will deal it more deliberately.

Mugam parthal:
This is pretty interesting one. The bride and the groom will comb the hair of the other. The twist in the tale is they would be combing with the wrong side. And each other would show the mirror to the other asking if they look good. Again, someone, usually the mischievous among the two, would show the wrong side of the mirror. The reaction of the other during the game would decide how they would deal with the decisions of the other. If the partner says that they indeed look good after that bad combing session, they are the understanding ones among the two. If they ask for another session where they stress the other to comb properly, they are going to be tough and for them truth is truth. No matter how much they love the other, they will place their self respect over the relationship and would expect the other to be the same.

Arisi taren parupu ta:
This one tests if both can live with what they earn. One of them will be given rice on their hand and the other will be given dal. They will be exchanging the goods with each other. In-between one of them would stop giving and the other has to give what they have to fill others hand. This shows that, in a family both might be earning or only one would be earning. Whatever be the scenario, they have to lead their life with what they earn and do not complain the other for not doing so.

There are other games too. But, these three gives the real picture of how life would be after marriage. Just thought I would share the traditional things like this for some time.

Happy wedding anniversary!

It's not just an ordinary day!
This is when I became us!
And life became more of you!
This is one year of everything we have to celebrate about our relationship!

We are away from each other!
To celebrate this day!
By cursing the cruelty of this long distance!

I was really afraid of getting into this!
Marriage and stuff!
And still there was some courage, a force
who/which made this beautiful thing happen between us!

Love! Did it really happen between us?
Do I really love you?
May be, you should answer those questions!

We are a more practical couple, people say!
And yet, I don't know why my head rings with you, when you laugh!

And your presence makes me more comfortable, than anyone elses!
And I have this urge of making you feel special every now and then!
Ideas never run out, when I think for you!

Sometimes, I wish I had seen you earlier!
I wish we had been having those eye locks!

Proposals and denials or breakups and patch ups?
Some bike rides and beach walks!
And a fight with the respective families to marry each other!
I doubt if you feel the same about me!

My life will be nothing without you!
All I can do is thank all the good people, who brought you to me!
And thank the time, for its kindness in waiting till I found the right person!

Love you! Miss you!
Happy one year of marriage, love and family life!
To you and me and the baby that's coming!
And to many more years of love I am preparing myself to give you!

A mother's dream!

When that small legs jump inside the womb,
A mother dreams of it.

When she screams loud to bring the baby outside,
And when she knows who it is!
A mother dreams of it.

A mother of a baby girl,
Dream of giving all the things she never had in her life to the baby!
She gives her beautiful cloths,
Her nature of loving people unconditionally,
And her unfulfilled dreams!

A mother of a baby boy,
Gives all it takes to make him a man of her dreams,
She has always loved,
Create him to be the one, she wanted to marry!

Basically, a baby is born with the shoulders so slender,
That carry the dream of their mothers!
A fruitful burden that decide who and what they become in the future!

Committed!

There is so much meaning inside this word!
So much meaning, yes, it has!

Like we say in love,
In love, is a commitment!
To the magic inside you,
To the unknown glimpses of the ever mysterious universe!

Like we say to work,
To work, is a commitment!
That we make to the food rendering and time managing part of life!
That makes life worth living!

Like we say to a relationship,
To relationship, is a commitment!
That we make by showing respect to the soul, bounded in the bond of life with us!
Either temporary or permanent!
But, it is the one that adds meaning to life!

Like we say to nature,
To nature, is a commitment!
That we are going to ruin or preserve it!
To bring back what was lot in time and
To live with what is available!

Like we say to a religion,
To religion, is a commitment!
That we follow a specific path,
That our lives are bound to principles of se kind! That we find spiritual connection and belonging to a god!

To commitment, Is a commitment!
That we live and that we lose some where!
And that makes us human!

Too much love!

There's too much love in the air!
Yes, too much of it.

I thought love was all about life!
And it is true!
Thou shall not realise, will ponder over!
They will ponder over the unfulfilled dreams!
And it will not cost them anything less than themselves!

I thought love was without expectations!
And it is true.
You don't have compulsions in love!
You just do it, for the sake of it!
It never places burdens or responsibilities!
But, beware it hurts!
It hurts when you are not expecting that it would!
When you don't give it the right attention and respect!

Love... is simply love.
It doesn't have places to live.
It is not either made of big things...
But of petty and trivial expressions!
Like your mom cooking your favorite food!
And your dad giving you some extra pocket money!
Like your friends secrets in your heart!
And your boyfriend's or girlfriend's hugs!
Like your spouse's Valentine's day gifts and their travel plans with you!
And your sibling's extraordinary care in your low times!
Like your in-laws encouragements to do the things you love!
And in a random stranger, who holds the lift for you, when you are running late to office!
And in yourself! To a greater extent!

Love is not everything!
It is made of every small things!
That you do!
Take care of it!
It is as delicate as a baby in the womb!
And as elegant and wonderful as a heart beat of your little one!
And as unique and special as it kicks you from inside!
You will never know, until you find it for yourself!
So, explore! And love and live!

Too much love! Too much life!

-Dedicated to my family!