In the pursuit of myself!!!

Life is not full of butterflies and flowers.

Yes. It is not.

But the way you see the thorns and bumps also makes a difference.

You cannot walk on the thorns. Sure you cannot.

And you cannot go smoothly in a bump. No you cannot.

But you can always change the perspective,

With hope, yes you can.

After my last exams of undergraduate,

I had choices.

I had enough of it than anyone else.

I chose to not to choose hastily.

I waited, I tried new possibilities.

It was one good day,

I was suggested to do what I loved.

It was a friend, a well wisher,

And a person who gives a constant source of encouragement,

Okay, a good combination of all.

I thought I had my calling. Yes, it was. 

But, it was not easy.

I had bad times,

But it was less than anybody's, who did not have anything to choose.

I gave up one of the opportunity to become independent,
And I was scrutinized by more and most people.

I went to a state of depression.

I had to walk on thorns sometimes,

I never stopped.

So were some of my friends, going through the same phase of their life.

To remind me that I was not alone in the bizarre bumpy ride.

I was inspired by the optimism and hope they had.

Knowingly or unknowingly they shared it with me.

Thanks to them, their presence has made me who I am today.

I find solace in here.

A thing I love the most.

I had a different experience in all.

I am now identified as a person who can convey the thoughts reasonably well,

Through a medium called writing.

Some of my friends call me with a writers name I admire.

And I react like I do not want to accept that.

But I love it.

I am no longer an under graduate to the world.

I am an amateur writer now, a blogger.

I am seen as a person, who is living the dream.

And I don't want to hide, but admit that I am proud.

In the mean time,

I have found angels in people.

I have found that people will remain in my life, my family, no matter how terrible my decisions are.

I have found people, friends, who can make my bumpy ride funny,

I have found people who not only make but keep promises.

I have found that eventually some people will judge,

And I can accept that criticism,

Change myself for my own good if I really should or ignore them for the same reason. 

I have found the value of time.

I have found the value of belief.

I have found butterflies in the middle of thorny path,

I have found fragrance of flowers in the middle of emotional numbness. 
I have an identity now. 

I have found that dreams can eventually come true.

I have found a new start.

A success is not defined by how much money you earn.

It is defined by the amount of happiness experienced after doing the work.

And the self-urge it gives us to take up the responsibility of breaking the own achievement.

After posting every article,

There lies a sense of satisfaction.

After receiving a good or bad comment for my article,

There comes a sense of responsibility to develop in every way I can.

True that I don't succeed often.

But I try to develop after every step.

Now,

From the middle of nowhere,

I have got something what I longed to have,

What I waited for.

So true that it is going to be challenging to keep up between blogging and that.

But I know the value of a dream taking shape and an opportunity to make myself independent.

They are equally important in a person's life. 

It is the way to give a mutual back up to both the things.

And hence will hold on to them very tight.

I am not perfect, I will not be,

I am not the best, I will not be,

But I will never give up on trying to be one.

I promise to people who were there and supported me,

I will grow and make you proud, no matter what it takes from me,

And will be there with you through thick and thin,

To support and love the same way you did.

A note to people who left,

I am no longer worried about you.

Thanks, I can concentrate on who really cares.

Life teach lessons.

We, just, should have the patience to learn.

Rome was not built in a day.

So does human maturity.

I cannot say that I have got all of the maturity to handle the world right now.

But I can say it has evolved to some extent.

And this is just a start.

With hope,

In the pursuit of myself,

A human in the making, with the support of fellow humans, the world and the above,

Who are already great or deserve to be great in their own way.

Secular India and meat bans…

My article might be considered out of date for people who think that this intolerance topic and meet bans started two or three months back. But, if you see in a long run, I am too early to write about this because the New Year is nearing and the government would have to start the ban all from the first for the same festival will be celebrated next year too. And no way can the media remain silent about this. How could that happen? They would nag some unknown faces representing the right, left and center, gather some filthy comments from all of them and run those comments again and again until the viewer believes that it was the view of the entire party.

Small and sensible

India is a secular country, said my Civics book when I was in 10th grade. I was also explained what secular really means. As far as I understood, we live together with our Muslim, Christian and Buddhist, Jain, Parish and many other counterparts. It was said that Indian constitution treats all the religions equally and the beliefs of one should not be a great concern for the other. I also remember studying about one of the fundamental rights, 'Right to freedom of religion’.

Before my Civics book, it was my school which always insisted that we should say the prayer of other religions on any one of the days and we did, because there were no big concerns about what God we prayed to. It was about the unfinished home works from which we always wanted to escape. I never felt a difference between a Diwali and Ramzan or Pongal and Christmas as every festival gave me holidays and there were new films on the Television which hooked me to it. 

There were friends, whose believes were different from mine, on God and food. They still chatted with me and laughed with me and my Tiffin box was stolen sometimes for it was packed with some really delicious vegan foods. I have seen my childhood friend, who was supposed to be a vegan like me, ate non-vegan foods from other friends who brought it. The food was not shared based on religion. It was really based on which Tiffin box carried the delicious food. There was no big drama about what should be eaten by whom, as long as everybody had something good to eat.

Right to food

As and when seen in my personal opinion, what others tongue loves to taste is in no way a concern for a person next to him. I have learned that the freedom of one person ends at the tip of the other person's nose. A tongue lies at a far distance according to this point. 

To those who ruled

We think that this meat ban started this September, when the Maharashtra government tried to ban beef for 8 days during the Jain festival. People forget history. This ban was put during the same festival by the once ruling, now opposition party led government too, which talks about the intolerance among people.

To those who are ruling

Politics and vote banks play their dirty games everywhere, forgetting the fact that the head of a party (ruling or opposition) or a state or a nation should respect the fundamental rights of every citizen, ‘Right to life’ upon every other rights, especially in this case. The present ruling party has to learn this lesson before anything else. They were not voted majority for nothing.

To the artists and rationalists
Returning awards is a way of showing your concern in any matter. But who are getting affected? This pressure placed on the government would not be enough. There are people, who really need to understand that all have equal rights to practise their religion or taste of food. An article in one of the famous newspaper about the people community in Mumbai stuck me hard, when it portrayed how some people really exhibited their bitterness and prohibited establishment of meat shops or hotels and restaurants of non-vegan foods in their locality. How would returning awards change those people?

Real concern

And don’t forget the media. They have a great part in blowing up things to improper proportions.  No end to this. The constitution will remain the same and promises will be made in the next election by parties to create a secular India, a less intolerant one and probably with no meat bans. Oh! Yeah. We were, by the way, never secular in past. Were we?

There are bigger problems to concentrate. I hope the party; whichever is in power (in the state or central) or comes to power, understands that and acts according to it.

Unknown and Unnoticed

The little baby was named!
He blabbered like every other child of his age,
He loved his mother,
He loved the comfort she gave in her lap,
He loved the warmth of her heart when she held him near her breast.
He grew and he loved her more.

At the one end of the world was his father,
Toiling day and night,
He rose early, worked late hours,
And came home once in a while with the best toys in the world.
He was welcomed every time, for he bought with him the wonderful cars and helicopters.
Little the world knew what he had sacrificed,
Little that his wife knew what he was doing at office,
Little that his son knew how much hours of sleep he lost to get those stuffs.

Days passed.
The little boy once he was, turned into a big boy, not very big though,
His mother gave birth to his sibling,
And it was a beautiful girl, beautiful because she was a girl.

The boy loved his little sister,
For he was able to hold her in his arms,
For she smiled at him every time he played with her,
She grew with him.
He promised to protect her, no matter what!
They fought, they laughed,

She cried and he would always give up,
For he loved her smile more than her tears,
He took hours to make sure she had the best.

Big boy he was,
His enjoyments widened,
His pleasures granted,
And he loved his mom and sissy more than before.

He grew up and found that he had a passion,
His mom and sissy had plans,
Passion was costly and plans were big,
He always wanted to give the best for them,
So passion was buried and plans were given priority.

He loved them more,
But respected his father more than all the years of love he gave to mom and sissy,
For now he knew what it takes really to be a man,
For he really knew how every second of a man's life goes,
His sacrifices and toils,
Unknown and unnoticed!!!

Go ego!!!

Shalu was Ritu's best friend. Troubling teens, both were. They were in 10th grade and good at studies, top ten in the class. So nobody could complain about their mischevousness.

Shalu's house was near the temple. They used to go there and have fun. She was very lean, while Ritu was a bit fat. Forget their size differences, they were hell to handle together.

Shalu bought a new dress, a blue one with sandal stripes. It was a full hand dress with a netted shall. It was too good but too big for her. So she offered that new dress to Ritu. It looked perfect on her.

The day came, when Shalu left Ritu to another school. She resisted to go there. But her parents pushed her too much. Ritu was angry. When Shalu came to tell a good bye, Ritu did not talk. Even when she cried hugging her, Ritu did not yield. Both were very much hurt. Ritu wanted her to stay. Who would she have to talk? Who would she have to study with? Who would she have to tell about her crush on some boy? But, she did not ask her to stay. She did not tell her best friend, how important she was to her. How would she? Her ego won. Shalu left the place.

Shalu, on one random day, came to Ritu's house. She shouted at the top of her voice, asking for her blue dress.

'If you could not understand me, then no way you can have my dress.', she went near Ritu and said.

Ritu was breathless and was profusely sweating when she woke up. She became pale. Whenever she crosses Shalu's house while going to the temple, she would say, 'I am sorry baby. I cannot return your dress. I am sorry for not stopping you from going away. I am sorry for not understanding you that day.' How would she give her? Shalu died a month ago. It was a suicide and no one knew the reason. It was rumored that she could not bear being away from her family and her best friend.

In our lives, there comes a stage where our ego tries to conquer the true love we have for some people. It just makes the time we had with them a ghost. If we could forget that ego thing and show them how important they are to us, everything will be fine. Just fine. Try killing ego and you will never regret it. It works in every realtionship, frienship or love or anything.

Conflict of interest!!

"It was a tough day. Very tough indeed", said my conscience.

"So, why was it tough for you?", I questioned.

"It's a long story", said my conscience.

"Interesting one?", it was me.

"Yes, of course", said my conscience.

"Then try to fascinate me", I challenged.

"You will love this. It's a love story", said my conscience.

"Fine then, start it", I demanded.

"Do you know you have a heart and a brain?", it was my conscience.

"Excuse me, of course I know what I have and what I do not.", I raised my voice because I felt my conscience was hurting my ego.

"Fine can you please stop interrupting?", my conscience said.

"Then why did you ask a question at first place? You are so rude", I said.

"I am what you are. Caring and rude. Anyways I am sorry. Do you want the story or what?", again it was hurting my ego. But I managed to keep myself calm. What if my conscience have another trait of mine? Stubbornness- What if it became stubborn not to tell the story?

"Yes. I will keep my mouth shut. You continue with your story.", I said in a rather low voice.

Okay then, here is your story.

Today morning when you woke up, I was contacted from my court for a trial.

It was mentioned to be very urgent and I had to take a shortcut through your neurons. By the way, your electrical signals are quiet fast.

"So you travel through my neurons?!", I wanted to ask but I didn't want to interrupt the story. So just said "Mmmm. Thanks."

The case was a serious one. A divorce case it was.

"Who the hell wanted divorce?", I asked my conscience.

Your brain and heart, my conscience said. They are nuts, just like you.

I didn't want to comment. That was actually a true fact.

"What was their problem and who asked for it?", I tried to ask politely. I know, I failed.

Ignoring me but answering my question, my conscience continued. It was your brain. The reason was very silly. Your brain accused your heart of falling in love again and again. The weirdest reason I have ever encountered.

"Indeed", I said to myself.

My conscience continued the story in the mean time. Your brain says he encounters a lack of oxygen, whenever the heart falls in love. Sometimes the heart increases it's rate. Your heart falls in love often with lots of people, let's say with your parents, friends and with some of your relatives. And sometimes it suddenly loves to work on a completely a different thing while your brain is working on some other thing. This results in numbness. Your heart jumps like a monkey from one thing to another. This was your brain's argument.

Now it was your heart's turn to place its argument. Your heart just asked, "Who asked for the blood to be full of adrenalin? This secretion of Adrenalin, resulting in constriction of blood vessels: That increases my rate of beating and its completely under your control brainie. What do I have to do with it?", accused your heart.

"And of loving to work on different tasks, I thought brainie was capable of doing completely whatever I loved to do. I am sorry if I was wrong", said your heart.

Your brain was felling bad for destructing a belief of someone it loved. 

You know even I fall in love with your heart, my conscience said. It has not lost its childishness even after all these 22 years. I asked your heart with a little concern. It's not like you, you know. I should be careful with it. It gets hurt so easily.

"So there is a conflict of interest involved in the case. You sound like you are going to be on my heart's side. Even, I smell a rat man. You cannot be a judge", I said.

Yes absolutely. But I was a judge and so I controlled my feelings towards your heart and asked why was it loving so many people and tasks? I said to your heart that it might lead to a lot of bad consequences. Most of the time, when this happens the brain loses its sanity and subsequent actions are disrupted. "You get that?",  I asked your heart and continued saying, "When you break over a failure the brain's hypothalamus orders the release of cortisol, a hormone that increases depression. It even affects my (conscience) ability to cope up with things.

Your heart blinked like a baby trying to figure out what I said. Then it spoke like this to the brain,

"Hey. I know I make it difficult for you, sometimes. But, am I not the reason behind your drive to achieve things? Am I not helping you to come up, when you tire and fall down? You have filed a case because I fall in love often. Here is the truth, I love you. If that's a problem for you, then I request you", your heart turned towards me and said "You can proceed with your judgement and give us a divorce"

Then to your brain it said, "I am sorry that I made it hard for you brainie. But I still love you beyond anything in this world. I want to say you are the only one reason behind my life and if you gonna break our bond, I am not going to stay anymore. I am nothing without you"

I should admit that your heart is the most beautiful thing you have. It just had me spell bound and I didn't care about the conflict of interest at that moment. I wanted to say that I will not give divorce and wanted to slap your brain on its back and ask it to live with your heart for the rest of your life no matter what, even though there were enough reasons to give a divorce.

Thank god your brain too fell for your heart all over again. He withdrew the case and I was saved of my judgement. It was tough you know, in case if your brain did not fall, your heart would have left and think of me. I would have not come to tell the story to you. I am nothing without your heart even though I am a part of your brain at the first place.

"So where are they now?", I asked my conscience.

"Inside you, in love. Make use of them. They can take you wherever you want to. They are not the best in the world. No one have the best. But You can mould them to be the best in whatever you want to. You get that?", My conscience asked me. 

"I love this story and umm.. I want to say that I am nothing without you", I said to my conscience.

My conscience smiled.

All is well when you love yourself.